The Journey Continues…

Yesterday, we explored the importance of acknowledging and healing your inner child. Today, we’re diving deeper into the profound impact bullying can have on how we give and receive love.

Imagine this: You’ve worked so hard to heal your inner wounds, you’ve started to embrace your worth, and you’ve been learning to show yourself kindness. But when it comes to relationships—whether romantic, friendships, or even family—you find yourself stuck.

Maybe you struggle to trust others, or perhaps you hold back from fully opening your heart because deep down, you fear rejection. Maybe you’ve been the one who’s pushed others away, afraid they’ll hurt you like the bullies did. Maybe you find yourself over-giving, seeking validation in ways that never feel like enough.

It’s all connected. The bullying you experienced as a child didn’t just impact your self-esteem; it shaped how you experience love.

How Bullying Alters the Way We Love:

The Fear of Rejection:
If you were bullied, rejection may feel like an unbearable weight. When someone you care about pulls away, or when you don’t get the love and attention you want, it triggers a deep fear of being abandoned or unwanted. This can make you hesitant to express love or even accept love from others, because you’ve learned to guard your heart in self-protection.

Difficulty Trusting Others:
When you’ve been betrayed by peers or teased and rejected, trust becomes a fragile thread. Relationships feel risky, and you may constantly wonder if someone’s love for you is real or if, at any moment, it will vanish just like the people who let you down in the past.

Over-Giving and People-Pleasing:
Bullying teaches you that love and acceptance are earned, not given. So, you might find yourself overcompensating in relationships, constantly trying to please others in hopes they’ll accept you. But this behavior often leads to burnout, emotional depletion, and feelings of resentment. It’s a cycle of giving without receiving, leaving you feeling unfulfilled and disconnected.

Withholding Love in Fear of Getting Hurt:
On the flip side, some may retreat into emotional walls, convincing themselves that if they don’t give love, they won’t get hurt. This self-protective mechanism can prevent you from experiencing deep, meaningful connections and intimacy. You may push people away or keep them at arm’s length, even when you long for closeness.

But Here’s the Truth: You Deserve to Love and Be Loved Fully.

Healing from the trauma of bullying doesn’t just mean fixing the wounds from the past; it’s about transforming how you approach love in the present.

When you heal, you not only release the past pain—you reframe how you relate to love. You start to believe that you are worthy of healthy love, genuine affection, and meaningful connections. The scars no longer dictate how you engage with others.

Steps to Reclaiming Your Ability to Love and Receive Love:

Start by loving yourself first:
Self-love is the foundation of all healthy relationships. As you continue nurturing your inner child, you start to rewire the way you view yourself. You become the source of your own validation, and you learn to offer yourself the love and care you’ve always wanted from others. When you love yourself unconditionally, you open yourself up to receiving love in its purest form.

Challenge your trust issues:
Trust is a muscle that needs to be strengthened. Begin by practicing trust in small ways. Start by opening up to a close friend or family member. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, even when it feels uncomfortable. Each act of trust is a step toward healing those old wounds.

Set healthy boundaries:
Being able to give and receive love also means knowing when to say no and protecting your emotional well-being. Healthy boundaries teach you that it’s okay to prioritize your needs, and it’s okay to walk away from relationships that drain or disrespect you.

Release the fear of rejection:
Remember, rejection is not a reflection of your worth. It’s just part of life. Embrace the idea that you are lovable regardless of how others respond. Healing from bullying means unlearning the belief that rejection equals unworthiness.

Embrace vulnerability:
Vulnerability is a powerful tool in healing. Yes, it can feel risky, but it’s through vulnerability that we form deeper connections. Allow yourself to love openly, without fear of being hurt. The people who will truly love you will do so because they see your heart, scars and all.

The healing process may take time, and it won’t always be easy. You might face setbacks, and there will be moments when old wounds resurface. But each time you choose to love yourself, each time you choose to trust and be vulnerable, you are reclaiming your power. You are choosing to believe that love, real, honest love, is not only possible but your birthright.

. You don’t have to stay stuck in the past or let bullying define how you love. You have the power to heal and embrace the love you deserve. Are you ready to take the next step? Sign up for a one to one to one -session with me.